Are You A People-Pleaser?

Val Keay
Written by Val Keay

Why This is a Symptom of Low-Self Esteem & How You Can Change It.

As a recovering people-pleaser, I understand how exhausting and mentally draining this is.  It’s like a muscle that I had to exercise on a daily basis.  However, I now appreciate that people pleasing was a symptom of having low self-esteem and after having (and now offering) Rapid Transformational Therapy, this muscle has now become so much stronger that I feel more aligned with being my authentic self (more on that later).

Photo by Bich Tran

I love the phrase ‘comparison is the thief of joy’ and I know that rings true for many of my female clients. We often compare ourselves to others, wanting to be liked, feeling like others are somehow more superior than us, more confident than us, got life together more than us, better looking than us (etc, etc, etc).  The pressures of social media and curated lives only adds to the pressure of not being enough. How often have you found yourself doing the following:

  • Saying “sorry”, even when it’s not your fault
  • Struggling to say “no” and setting poor boundaries
  • Prioritising others’ needs over your own (often at a personal cost)
  • Not speaking your truth or what you really feel, so you don’t upset another person, or have a fear of being judged and disliked
  • Dressing in a ‘safe’ way as you fear being noticed

Many of us feel this way and assume this is who we are, and were ‘born this way’ and will never change.  We think it’s just us.  However the good news is…

YOU CAN CHANGE! 

Many of us developed limiting beliefs which were picked up unconsciously in childhood.  It could’ve been due to traumatic experiences both large and small.  It could be a parent/carer/teacher that told us ‘you’re never going to amount to anything’ or, a larger trauma which knocked our sense of self.  It may not be one big thing, it could be a cumulation of lots of little things that chipped away at you.  Nevertheless these unconscious and conscious beliefs have now become completely embedded and programmed into your subsconsious, this lack of worth now feels just ‘who I am’.

Photo by Pixabay

Imagine a day where you glide through the world,  where you speak your truth, look, feel and dress like a million dollars (figuratively speaking), feel aligned to your values and purpose and know your worth.  You feel vibrant and confident and don’t apologise for who you are and radiate happiness and contentment.

Well, this is possible & more.

Rapid Transformational Therapy (RTT®) is an amazing therapy that helps you get to the source of why you have limiting beliefs about yourself. It uses hypnotherapy (simply put, this just means you get into a very relaxed state and turns off your conscious mind and tunes into your subconscious) and aims to target the root cause of limitations, removing them and then embeds empowering more positive beliefs in your subconscious mind. It addresses this imbalance and allows you to step into the best version of yourself you were always meant to be. 

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

If you’re interested to learn more, I’d love to chat to you about how RTT can help.  You can book a Discovery Call or alternatively visit firefly-wellness.org..

I look forward to hearing from you and to help you to regain your spark!


Main – Photo by Ahmed Zayan on Unsplash