The Will To Act
I woke up this morning reflecting on a question that’s been popping up regularly recently…
Am I willing to take care of myself?
My current focus is on the will to take care of myself. In the midst of demanding times – be it current world events, a torrent of work responsibilities, economic challenges or providing support to a loved one – we often find ourselves downplaying our own well-being in favour of others. We start to lose our daily routine; maybe our sleep is off, we cancel a workout session, or start eating food that disturbs our stomach. It could be one or more of these or not managing to get started with those activities that you believe are healthy. Soon enough, our mood is low, maybe we feel anxious or agitated, and a familiar spiral grabs hold of us. Stress can hijack our nervous system, causing it to shift from a state of connection to a state of protection, resulting in dysregulation. If you resonate with that, I invite you to cast a compassionate light on these needs, banishing any misplaced guilt that suggests self-care is synonymous with selfishness.
Central to this inquiry is the will to change. During periods of stress, time becomes a scarce commodity, and amid the chaos of uncompleted tasks, fatigue, and perhaps even a sense of confusion, frustration or loneliness, it’s easy to side line our own well-being. We ́re quick to tell ourselves, “Now is not the time”, and unwittingly, we grow progressively weaker with each passing day.
When our willpower is lacking, action can be elusive, often overshadowed by a multitude of excuses. So, I ask again…
Are you willing to take care of yourself?
There are moments when the most honest response might be: “Not right now”. If the answer is no, due to extreme circumstances, then I put an alarm on my phone for a later time in the day to re-evaluate the situation. The main point here is to make a conscious decision – instead of being pulled by the current of stress – struggle against it. And even as we do so, let’s remember not to judge ourselves with phrases like “I should be exercising” or “I should get to bed earlier”. The aim is to avoid layering guilt upon the burdens we´re already shouldering. Notice that step and it will help you liberate yourself.
Answer: YES!
When we can partially or fully answer yes – then the invitation is to take a moment and re-ignite the will to take care of yourself! You are worthy, and a more relaxed/calm/rested you translates into happier people around you.
Remember, one step is all it takes to start – so make this commitment about a micro moment of suffering. Make this commitment ASAP! The longer we wait, the harder it gets.
“You don’t have to be great to start,
~ Zig Ziglar
but you have to start to be great”
This is the first step in your journey. My advice is to spend as much time as needed on your foundation of self-care. With time, the question “are you willing to take care of yourself?” provides different insights as one dives deeper into our patterns and the subconscious beliefs that sustain them. In the beginning though, we often feel overwhelmed and confused so my initial advice is to focus on self-care as that will provide the calm and clarity needed.
So, every time you feel confused and unsure what to do, let the answer be – take care of yourself! In any form possible!
Start Small On The Path Of Self-Care
When we are feeling overwhelmed, with our nervous system in fight-or-flight mode, making elaborate plans to fix everything often backfires, making the situation more overwhelming. When the mind starts creating elaborate plans to fix everything, start with acknowledging that this is a moment of suffering. It could be as small as the confusion/frustration of deciding what to eat on a day when everything is going wrong.
Start there with befriending your nervous system. Practicing mindfulness can help you identify when you’re in this state. When you recognise it, take a moment to sit down and notice the sensations in your body. Familiarise yourself with this state of stress labelling it for what it is: A moment of suffering. This can create acceptance and ease. Get creative: Come up with a name of “stressed you”, journal or draw yourself in that state. The point is to create a sense of ease with this state, so it loses its strong grip on us.
In conclusion, in the midst of life´s chaos and challenges, your willingness to take care of yourself is an act of self-compassion. By embracing self-care, you not only support your well-being but also create a ripple effect of positivity in the lives of those around you. Empower yourself with a conscious decision to take care of yourself. Start small and prioritise befriending your nervous system in times of stress. For more guidance on healing your nervous system exercises or ask for guidance from a bodywork therapist.
Your well-being deserves your attention, and you deserve a happier and healthier life!
Resources
Main – Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash
