Welcome, to Health & Wellbeing Magazine’s Spirit Keeper monthly column.  We are one year old!   This is the place where you will discover tips and practices for creating, developing and maintaining a personalised self-care practice. 

As we move into the 2^nd year of this column, I would like to expand upon different exercises (rituals) which are spirit centred, mind centred and body centred.  Each month will also come with a monthly challenge.  The idea is to prove to yourself and your own clients’ the power of specific exercises (rituals) in integrating mind, body and spirit.  After all, in order for there to be change within the world, we need to be the ones who are embodying it and grounding it.

This is what you can look forward to in the months’ ahead.

• Spirit centred practice – prayer
• Spirit centred practice – meditation
• Spirit centred practice – contemplation
• Spirit centred practice – grounding & centring
• Mind centred practice – intention & reprogramming
• Mind centred practice – reading & studying
• Mind centred practice – journalling & Emotional Intelligence
• Mind centred practice – releasing & Spiritual Intelligence
• Body centred practice – movement & Spiritual connection
• Body centred practice – massage & detoxification
• Body centred practice – dancing & Spiritual connection
• Body centred practice – body & nutrition

If you are new to this month’s Spirit Keeper column, I recommend reading past articles to find out what a spirit keeper is and subjects already covered around self-care practices throughout 2023/2024.

In this month’s column we will be focusing on the spirit centred practice of prayer.

Metaphorical Story Demonstrating the Power of Prayer

The ancient village of Mana lay nestled in a valley often shrouded in a peculiar, clinging mist. This mist wasn’t born of water, but of the collective anxieties and sorrows of its inhabitants. Their shoulders were perpetually hunched, their breaths shallow, and their minds a whirlwind of worry. Even the vibrant hues of the valley seemed muted by its oppressive presence.

Among them lived Kiara, a young woman whose spirit, though tested, refused to surrender entirely. She, too, felt the tendrils of the mist, but she remembered tales her grandmother told of a forgotten spring, rumoured to possess the power to clear the densest fog. This spring, her grandmother said, wasn’t a physical place but a wellspring within each person, accessed through a practice called “Whispers of the Heart.”  This practice was a form of prayer.

One particularly heavy morning, as the mist pressed down like a lead blanket, Kiara decided to seek this inner spring. She found a quiet clearing, away from the village’s collective sigh. Closing her eyes, she began the Whispers of the Heart exercise.

First, she focused on specific intention. She pictured the mist lifting, not just from the village, but from her own mind, revealing the bright, clear sky. She saw herself standing tall, her breath deep and even, her heart light. This wasn’t a vague hope; it was a vividly imagined future, a clear destination for her spirit.

Next, she turned her attention to relaxing her body. She imagined the mist as tension, clinging to her muscles. With each conscious breath, she willed it to dissipate, starting from her toes, up through her calves, her thighs, her abdomen, her chest, her shoulders, and finally, releasing from her scalp. Her body, accustomed to being a vessel of worry, began to soften, like parched earth finally receiving rain.

As her body relaxed, her breathing naturally deepened.

This was the third step: deeper breathing. She felt the air fill her lungs completely, expanding her rib cage, and then slowly, fully exhaling, releasing not just air, but the clinging shadows of anxiety. Each deep inhale was a drawing in of pure, clear energy, and each exhale a surrender of what no longer served her.

With her body relaxed and her breath flowing freely, Kiara then focused on personal wellbeing. She didn’t dwell on what was wrong, but on what she wished to cultivate. She envisioned a sense of calm spreading through her, like warm sunlight. She saw her mind becoming a peaceful lake, its surface unruffled by stray thoughts. She felt a deep, abiding sense of safety and inner strength take root within her.

Finally, and perhaps most powerfully, Kiara extended her Whispers of the Heart to others. She began wishing others well. She pictured the mist lifting from her neighbours, from the grumpy baker, from the weary farmer, from the anxious children. She imagined smiles replacing frowns, lightness replacing heaviness, and peace settling over the entire village. This act of selfless well-wishing created a ripple effect, strengthening the spring within her own heart.

As Kiara continued this practice day after day, a subtle shift occurred. The mist over Mana began to thin. At first, it was barely perceptible, like a wispy veil. But gradually, patches of blue sky appeared. The villagers, noticing the change, wondered aloud what was happening. They saw Kiara, no longer hunched, but moving with a quiet grace, a gentle smile gracing her lips.

Inspired by her radiant change, some villagers approached Kiara, curious about her secret. She shared the Whispers of the Heart, teaching them how to tend to their own inner springs. Slowly, one by one, they began to practice.  The results were transformative. The mist, once an ever-present burden, lifted almost entirely, revealing the vibrant greens of the valley, the sparkling river, and the cheerful yellow of the sun. The villagers’ shoulders straightened, their breaths deepened, and laughter, once a rare sound, now echoed freely through the streets.

The village of Mana, once shrouded in the mist of collective suffering, became a beacon of light, all because one young woman dared to tap into the powerful, transformative spring of inner prayer.

What is a Prayer?

Prayer, in its broadest sense, is an act of communication by humans with the sacred or holy. This “object of worship” can be God, gods, a transcendent realm, supernatural powers, or even a deified ancestor. While often associated with religious practices, the underlying principles of intention, focus, and connection resonate across various spiritual and secular approaches to well-being.

Here is a breakdown of what prayer entails:

Core Aspects of Prayer:

Prayer is a deeply personal and universal human phenomenon, reflecting a fundamental desire to connect with something greater than oneself and to navigate the complexities of life with a sense of meaning and purpose.

Communication/Rapport: At its heart, prayer is an attempt to establish a connection or dialogue with something beyond oneself, whether it’s a divine being, a higher power, or an inner spiritual dimension.

Invocation/Supplication/Intercession: In its narrowest sense, prayer involves asking for something, whether it’s for oneself (supplication) or on behalf of others (intercession).

Thanksgiving & Praise: Prayer also commonly includes expressing gratitude for blessings received and offering adoration or praise to the object of worship.

Confession & Contrition: Many forms of prayer involve acknowledging one’s shortcomings, expressing sorrow for wrongdoings, and seeking forgiveness.

Meditation & Contemplation: More abstract forms of prayer can involve quiet reflection, focused thought, or simply being in the presence of the sacred, aiming for a deeper union or understanding.

Forms & Practices of Prayer:

Prayer can take diverse forms, depending on the tradition and individual:

Formal/Liturgical: Part of a set ritual or liturgy, often with prescribed words, gestures, or times.

Hymns/Incantations/Creedal Statements: Prayer can be integrated into various verbal or musical expressions.

Individual/Group: Performed alone in private or collectively as part of a community.

Physical Postures: Can involve kneeling, bowing, standing, prostrating, or specific hand gestures.

Spontaneous/Informal: Unscripted and personal expressions of the praying individual, reflecting their immediate thoughts and feelings.

Vocal/Silent: Spoken aloud, whispered, or simply thought.

Purpose & Significance of Prayer:

Beyond simply asking for things, prayer serves multiple profound purposes:

Building Relationship: For many, prayer is a primary way to cultivate a personal and intimate relationship with their deity or higher power.

Expressing Devotion & Worship: It’s a way to acknowledge the greatness and goodness of the divine.

Finding Peace & Comfort: Engaging in prayer can bring a sense of solace, reduce anxiety, and foster inner peace, especially in times of difficulty.

Intervention & Efficacy: Many believers hold that prayer can influence outcomes, bringing about healing, protection, or other desired changes in the world. While scientific studies on the efficacy of prayer for healing have yielded mixed results, the personal experience of feeling heard or seeing positive changes remains powerful for many.

Seeking Guidance & Understanding: Prayer can be a means to discern purpose, find direction, and gain insight into life’s challenges.

Spiritual Growth & Transformation: Prayer is often seen as a catalyst for personal change, helping individuals to develop virtues like gratitude, humility, patience, and compassion. It can challenge one’s perspective and help them align with what they perceive as a higher will.

Strengthening Faith: Consistent prayer can reinforce belief and trust in a higher power.

What are the Physiological Benefits of Prayer?

While the scientific study of prayer is complex and often intertwined with broader religious and spiritual practices, a growing body of research suggests that engaging in prayer can have several measurable physiological benefits, particularly related to stress reduction and overall well-being. These benefits often overlap with those observed in meditation and other mindfulness practices.

Here are some of the key physiological benefits attributed to prayer:

Activation of the Relaxation Response: Prayer often involves focused attention, quietude, and rhythmic breathing, which are hallmarks of the “relaxation response.” This response, first described by Dr. Herbert Benson of Harvard Medical School, is the opposite of the “fight-or-flight” response. It leads to:

• Lowered Heart Rate: The heart beats more slowly and calmly.
• Decreased Blood Pressure: Blood vessels relax, reducing pressure on artery walls.
• Slower Breathing Rate: Respiration becomes deeper and more regular.
• Reduced Oxygen Consumption: The body’s metabolic rate slows down.

Reduction in Stress Hormones: Prayer can help to modulate the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal (HPA) axis, which is the body’s central stress response system. This can lead to:

• Lower Cortisol Levels: Cortisol is the primary stress hormone. Chronic elevated cortisol can suppress the immune system, increase inflammation, and contribute to various health problems. Prayer can help normalize these levels.
• Reduced Adrenaline/Norepinephrine: These hormones are also part of the “fight-or-flight” response. Their reduction contributes to a calmer physiological state.

Enhanced Neurochemical Balance:  Prayer stimulates various biochemical and neurological functions within the body.

• Activation of Brain Regions associated with Emotional Regulation: fMRI studies have shown that prayer activates areas like the prefrontal cortex and anterior cingulate cortex, which are involved in emotional control and attention. This can lead to improved emotional resilience and less reactivity to negative emotions.

• Better Cardiovascular Health: The cumulative effect of lowered heart rate, blood pressure, and stress hormones can contribute to improved cardiovascular health and potentially a lower risk of heart disease.

• Decreased Amygdala Activity: The amygdala is the brain’s “fear centre.” Reduced activity in this area during prayer can lessen feelings of anxiety, fear, and the “fight-or-flight” response.

• Increased Grey and White Matter: Some studies have hinted at structural changes in the brain, with potential increases in grey and white matter in certain areas, though more research is needed here.

• Increased Serotonin Production: Research suggests that specific prayer practices, especially those involving rhythmic breathing, can activate brain regions associated with serotonin synthesis. Serotonin is a neurotransmitter crucial for regulating mood, emotional balance, and overall mental well-being.

• Improved Immune Function: By reducing stress hormones and promoting a relaxation response, prayer can indirectly support the immune system. Chronic stress suppresses immunity, making the body more vulnerable to illness. A calmer state can help reverse this suppression and potentially reduce inflammatory markers.

• Improved Sleep Quality: By promoting relaxation and reducing anxiety, prayer can help individuals fall asleep more easily and experience more restful sleep.

• Pain Management: For many, prayer is a significant coping mechanism for chronic pain. While not directly eliminating the source of pain, it can alter pain perception, reduce the distress associated with pain, and enhance the body’s natural analgesic responses. This can be partly due to the placebo effect, but also to the other physiological changes described above.

It is important to note the physiological benefits of prayer are often attributed to its similarity to meditative and mindfulness practices. The key elements of prayer seem to be the focused attention, regular relaxed breathing, setting mindful intentions, and the emotional/spiritual connection prayer fosters.

How to Pray

There is no single “right” way to pray, as prayer is deeply personal and varies across traditions and individuals. However, drawing from common practices and the benefits written above, here is a simple guide on how to pray. 

This simply guide focuses on specific things you can do, without necessarily adhering to one specific religion.   Think of it as a framework for connecting with something larger than yourself and fostering inner well-being.

The Essentials of Prayer (Universal Approach):

1. Find a Quiet Space & Time:

Specificity: Choose a place where you won’t be interrupted – a quiet room, a corner of your garden, even a few minutes in your car.

Time: Set aside a specific time, even if it’s just 5-10 minutes initially. Consistency helps build a habit. Morning, before bed, or during a quiet moment in the day are common choices.

2. Get Comfortable & Relax Your Body:

Posture:

You can sit, kneel, stand, or even lie down. The goal is to be comfortable enough that your body isn’t a distraction, but not so comfortable that you fall asleep (unless that’s your intention for sleep prayer).

Relaxation:

Specific Action: Begin by consciously relaxing your body. Start from your toes and move up to your head, tensing and then releasing each muscle group. Notice where you hold tension (shoulders, jaw, forehead) and intentionally soften those areas.

Deep Breathing: Take a few slow, deep breaths. Inhale deeply through your nose, letting your belly rise, hold for a few seconds, and then exhale slowly through your mouth, feeling the tension leave your body. Repeat 3-5 times. This activates the relaxation response.

3. What is the purpose of this prayer? (Set Your Intention):

Specificity: Before you begin, decide what you want to focus on. Are you seeking:

1. Comfort? (Seeking solace in a difficult time)
2. Connection? (Simply to feel a sense of presence or connection to the divine/universe).
3. Forgiveness? (For yourself or others)
4. Gratitude? (Thanking for specific blessings)
5. Guidance? (Asking for clarity on a decision)
6. Healing? (For yourself or others)
7. Peace? (Cultivating inner calm)

Mental Note/Verbalisation: You can say this intention silently to yourself or even whisper it aloud. “My intention for this prayer is to find peace about…” or “I am praying to express my gratitude for…”

4. Focus Your Mind & Engage Your Heart:

Concentration: Your mind will wander – it’s normal. Gently bring your focus back to your intention or your breath whenever it drifts. Don’t judge yourself for distractions.

Heart-Centeredness: Try to connect with your emotions. Prayer isn’t just a mental exercise; it’s an experience of the heart. Feel the gratitude, the longing, the peace, or the compassion.

Different Styles of Prayer (Choose what resonates):

Listed here are specific “things to do” based on common prayer approaches:

A. Prayer of Gratitude/Thanksgiving:

• Specific Action: Mentally (or verbally) list things you are genuinely grateful for. Start with the big things (health, loved ones) and then move to the small, often overlooked things (a warm drink, a sunny moment, a kind word, the feeling of your breath).  Afterwards complete this in your gratitude journal.

• Deepening: Try to FEEL the gratitude in your body, perhaps a warmth in your chest.

B. Prayer of Supplication/Asking:

• Specific Action: Clearly state what you are asking for. Be as specific as you can and also open to how the answer might manifest. For example, instead of just “make me rich,” perhaps “guide me to opportunities that bring financial stability and allow me to serve others.”

• Focus on Qualities: You might ask for qualities like courage, compassion, patience, wisdom, or inner strength, rather than just external outcomes.

• Relinquish Control: After stating your request, practice letting go of the outcome. Trust that what is meant to be, or what is for your highest good, will unfold in the right time space sequence.

C. Prayer of Intercession (Wishing Others Well):

• Specific Action: Bring specific people to mind – loved ones, friends, clients and even those you find challenging. Wish them well. You can use phrases like: “May [Name] be healthy and strong,” “May [Name] find peace and comfort,” “May [Name] be free from suffering.”

• Expanding Circle: You can expand this to groups of people (those suffering from a specific illness, refugees, people in conflict zones), or even the entire world.

• Feel the Compassion: As you wish them well, try to generate a genuine feeling of compassion and warmth for them.

D. Prayer of Contemplation/Presence:

• Specific Action: This is less about words and more about being. Focus on your breath, a single word (like “Peace,” “Love,” “God”), or a simple image (e.g., a serene light).

• Focus on the Body: Sometimes, simply being present with the sensations in your body can be a form of prayer.

• Silent Listening: See this as a time to listen rather than speak. Be open to insights, feelings, or a sense of presence.

Important Considerations for Any Prayer:

• Action: While prayer is powerful, it’s often a catalyst for action. If you pray for guidance, be open to insights that lead to specific steps you need to take.

• Consistency, Not Perfection: Don’t worry if your mind wanders or if you don’t “feel” anything immediately. The act of showing up regularly is powerful.

• Gratitude at the End: It’s often helpful to conclude your prayer with a word of thanks, regardless of how you feel or what you experienced.

• Honesty: Be honest about your feelings, doubts, and struggles. Prayer isn’t about pretending; it’s about authentic connection.

• Patience: Prayer isn’t a vending machine. Answers or insights may come subtly, over time, or in unexpected ways.

Start simply. Choose one or two of these suggestions that resonate with you, and practice regularly. You’ll find that your own unique way of praying will emerge.

Summary & Conclusion

While the content of the prayer (e.g., specific religious beliefs) may be significant for an individual’s spiritual well-being, the act of prayer itself, with its associated physiological changes, appears to confer tangible benefits on the body and mind, and is, therefore, a powerful tool within the Spirit Keeper’s self-care toolbox.

Monthly Challenge

If you are an active practising healing practitioner, I would recommend having a specific time where you pray for the wellbeing of your patients.  Either at the start of the day prior to all treatments or at the end of the day after all treatments are completed.

To get started, make a general note of the type of feedback you receive from your clients and how often.  Do they recommend your services to others or not?   Then start an active prayer time for your clients and make note of the feedback received from them.  Is there a change in the feedback and is their response to your services more positive?

Next month…

In next month’s column we will be focusing on the spirit centred practice of meditation.  Meditation is a powerful tool in the Spirit Keeper’s toolbox as well as being one of the keys to unlocking the wisdom of higher conscious awareness.

Until next month. From one kindred spirit to another – be safe, be well, be authentically you.

In gratitude

Kathleen