It’s no happy chance that some people seem to have it all and others seem to fall at every hurdle, one thing after another cropping up, set back after set back. No, the Universe isn’t cruel and enjoys punishing some and rewarding others. If we’re on the wrong path, we need a nudge to change course and that nudge may go on for some time. Maybe we are feeling constant pain, maybe we just keep repeating the same old self sabotaging behaviour and no matter what relationship we have, or career path we try, we find ourselves back in exactly the same situation as we were previously, with those same feelings of pain or lack?
The limitations and needs within us are felt keenly and it’s easy to know when we are not happy or hurting or feeling that something’s missing. When it all gets too much for us, we need a quick fix to lighten our pain, to dull it and push it down. So we often seek external gratification to make us feel better and continue in this loop of perhaps buying new things or starting new relationships or jobs; anything to take that hurt away momentarily. I call it ‘chasing the smoke’. When there is a wound deep within us, it burns like a fire. This fire does not go out if left unattended, it just keeps burning over time, over the years, and grows within us. When we feel the heat from the fire but do nothing about it, other than momentary self gratification, we are simply chasing the smoke and putting off putting the fire out for another day, week, year?
Knowing which therapy is right for you
If you have a problem in your life, maybe it’s a frustration or unexplained pain, then perhaps you are running on a pattern of behaviour that is not serving you. There may be some deep-seated belief that you are totally unaware of that has become your programme that you operate from. It is not easy to see it or find it alone, although time spent with oneself is definitely key. Pursuits such as meditation, yoga, and other self-development therapies are one way of going within to understand ourselves better. However if you are not quite able to target the problem alone, then it is definitely beneficial to seek help in the form of a therapist. The list of therapies is long and varied but one will speak to you and I often say that it will find you.
Knowing which therapist is right for you?
Once you have decided upon your therapy of choice, it is a case of choosing the right therapist for yourself. I believe word of mouth to be one of the best ways and then chatting to them to see if you both ‘fit’. I personally offer a free no obligation 20 minute online chat for this purpose, where we can meet to ask each other any questions and of course find out more about the problem and discuss the therapies. We both get an instant impression of the other person and immediately have an idea if this would be a good working relationship for each other.