“Please will you tell my cat to stand up to the dog?” This was a query I had from a client recently. The situation is that there are two cats and a dog in the home and the dog pesters one of them by chasing him inside the house.
A Household In Stress:
Their owner is quite upset about this as it causes stress for the whole family. She wants the cat to be able to relax in the lounge with everyone. The owner has worked very hard with the dog to stop this chasing but it hasn’t completely stopped, so what she wants is the cat to stand up for himself. She believes that if he does this, the dog will back down, as he does with the other cat. So what she wanted to know was “Why won’t he do it? Why won’t he stand up for himself?” And I wanted to solve the mystery: Why were the dog and the cat fighting?
Understanding the Cat’s Perspective:
First, I connected with the cat. After a pleasant chat he shared that he’s a “pacifist”, he’s “zen” and “chill”. It seems more effort than it’s worth to stand up to the dog and he’d rather just rely on his reflexes to run away if and when he needs to. He feels it would be ‘confrontational’ to stand up to the dog.
Unveiling the Dog’s Misconception:
Next, I then tuned in with the dog, got to know him a little and then and asked why he chases this cat and not the other cat. It turns out he believes the cat he chases LIKES it, and it’s all a good game! So I explained that “no, he doesn’t like it”. The dog was crestfallen and very surprised. He became quite upset and remorseful.
A Sweet Reconciliation:
At this point, the cat joined the conversation. He dropped in and he reassured the dog, sharing a symbolic image of the two of them touching foreheads, eyes closed, in a gesture of love and friendship. The dog apologised, the cat accepted the apology and they each said they loved each other. It was a sweet and touching moment and honestly, I got a bit tearful at this point!
The Innovative Solution:
They then came up with an innovative solution, which I believe was mostly the cat’s idea. Here’s what they shared: They want the owner to mark out a zone in the house which is a “no game zone” for relaxing, where the dog must not chase. The cat shared an image of the owner using a piece of masking tape to mark out the boundary of the “no game zone” along the bottom of the walls and the carpet.
Implementing the Solution:
The idea is that the dog is allowed to chase up to this point and no further. They gave me some words for the owner to say when the dog reaches this boundary, to show that the game is over and he must not chase in the ‘no game zone’. She can say “good game!” in an enthusiastic voice to indicate ‘game over’.
Photo by Arina Krasnikova
Visual and Emotional Reinforcement:
She can also reinforce this by describing to them how the chasing affects her and back this up by sending visual images and emotions of her being upset and disappointed whilst they chase. She can then follow this with images and emotions of her being happy and proud when there is no chasing and the atmosphere is harmonious. I thought this was such a clever solution – a small zone where a little bit of chasing is allowed and then a ‘no game zone’ where everybody relaxes.
A Harmonious Home and a Proud Pet Parent:
I followed up with the owner a week later, and this is what she had to say: “4 years of hell and now one week of bliss!!!!! Hi Emma, The dog has been absolutely amazing with the cat, I can count on one hand how many times he has bothered him! The cat is now spending masses of time in the lounge with us and even choosing to stay in there in his cat tree overnight when the dog is there and we are in bed (previously he has always slept in my daughter’s room at night).
I come home from being out and they are both in the lounge! The dog has been really reeling it in. Please, if you wouldn’t mind, could you send a thank you to the dog and a well done, I am SO proud of him! Thank you so much. The dog is an incredibly anxious and reactive dog in all aspects of life so this means so much”
It was amazing to work with a pet parent who would stop at nothing to help her cat and dog, and the animals themselves who were willing to work together. I am so happy to have been able to help them. I wish them all the best in the future!
Main – Photo by Adrien Bruneau on Unsplash
